Erm...

I think this is only a history now...

I am a Student

What I am trying to say is that I am a student...

How busy can a student be?

Well...let me tell you how busy I am and you can either feel sorry for me or think I am such a bitch for talking all this shit.

So, yea...First off all I got the assignmentssss for sure. I am a good student (at least I am trying to since this is my last semester, but do you remember about me made a full attendance last semester? That was awsome).

The second thing is dance club. I am going to perform at Spring Mall again this coming Sunday. We performed before and it was really fun since before the performance we fool around and Wilson was doin his robot moves when we decided to put out bag ON him...

LoL. I think the management like it so yea... Here we are.

Performing again. We are going to perform something like what we did for Swinburne Grand Opening but a lil bit different in moves and also dancers. How long is the routine? 7:36 yea...short by 1 minute from the one before. At least it's not 8 minutes...

Another thing that appear to be on my schedule is... shooting. What the heck? Yea. So Nindya is doing her Digital Video and Audio subject which requires her to shoot and edit a movie (it can be a movie, advertisement, music video or whatsoever that you can think of).

So she asked me to be her actress. She is goin to make a movie without a conversation (yea...I like that). And my partner will be Udith. My shooting schedule is this coming Wednesday, Thursday and Friday. Wish me luck everybody =)

Random

I just feel like blogging...Please bear with me. Here are the few random things. And, I know I should upload more picture...And I will do so...just wait yea...

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I am going to perform at The Spring for the late night shopping program in which the mall (and the shops) open until 12 midnight. This late night shopping happen every saturday on the first week of every month. I am not performing every month. It is just this month. June. I am flattered, so to speak. I am actually very happy that we could perform outside Swinburne. I did perform for the Malaysian government during their sports week last time but that was not really happening. I will perform tomorrow 7 June 2008. If you are free, do drop by since sometime the shops are offering BIG discount.

*******
My Dad, Mom, and GrandMa are here. They are all here. My grandma... I could not believe that she is here. I am kinda have to behave a little bit. She knows that I am crazy. She knows that I am noisy. But still, I think I should at least reduce those habits while she is around. I prefer to dress more girly and not wearing my short pants as well. I will be screwed if she see me wearing a pants that short. And I am quite sure that she will say "oh my frekin god, dont you ashamed showing your fat thights?"... (in chinese...and I exaggerate a lil' bit).

*******
I want to do another project. Although I know it will make me stress (again). And, apparently, I got one. A project from my brother. He asked me to build a website for his company. A simple one he said. Well, I think I will post it up here once I am done with it.

*******
I want to lose weight. Not because I want to attract guy or whatsoever thing. I want to look good when I am dancing (that is one point) and I want to train my muscle, especially my arm because I want to be able to surf (that is the second point). Have I ever mentioned that I have the potential to have diabetes (not a good news...dont think shud have post it here). Therefore I should not be too fat because it higher the possibility of me getting diabetes (that is the third point). So, I have to lose some weight.

*******
I want to go to San Fransisco (no, I did not forget about Paris...It still is my number 1 priority). I want to go there not because Daniel is there but because I am playing a game called "Big City Adventure - San Fransisco" and I found out that SF is a beautiful city.

*******
I am very imaginative lately (not "that" kind of imagination). I imagine the life where I stay alone in my own apartment, working and have breakfast every morning. Grab my cup of tea (not coffee, I dont drink coffee). Wearing my formal suit and waiting for my MRT train. Well, those stuff... You know... I think I should work on what is matter now first then think of that.

*******
I am confused because I do not know who to trust. Mr J told me that Mr K is a liar. That he owed money to his friends (friendSSSS). That he told everybody about the dance party that he organized (I am the organizer). Mr K is one of my buddy. I do not know who to trust. Mr J was looking for Mr K to return his money but then Mr K said he will pay as soon as he get the profit from the dance party he organized. I dont dare to ask Mr K and I dont want to get involved in the problem between both of them so I better to keep my mouth closed.

*******
I just realized that I have been blogging for 1 year (not always update my blog tho). Happy anniversary... I will remember the date next year.

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I am going to the Spring now... I will post Random - part 2 some other time...

Im FREE... am I?

Well, finally I have finished my final project. I had my presentation yesterday. It was OK. Our client Mr.Wesley had been very nice for not giving any harsh comment.

Actually, loads of thing happened yesterday. We had a, so-called, rehearsal in the morning with our supervisor and the other final project students. It was horrible since our system was not running smoothly. There were loads of errors. And guess what. Mr. Wesley sent me a message saying that he would like to make it (presentation) earlier. O.o

*take a deep breath*
ARGHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHHH

How am I supposed to fix all the problem when everyone was not around (they went home to change) and I only had 1 hour. Sh*t.

However, I managed to calm myself down since I am the leader and I could not panic when my team mates are. Luckily it went well =)

First I thought that I would be free after I get over with it. Yea, I do feel free but suddenly I feel empty. I have no more project to do. I do not have to contact my client anymore. I do not have to debug all the codes anymore. I think it is alright but then it is not alright at the same time.

If I do have a project next time, I will have to deal with new people and new project and new client and new... well... everything. Seems like I could not believe that it is over. 1 year is a long time. But it felt like it was yesterday when I met my client for the first time.

Anyway, I just want to say thank you to all of my team member (actually, I am not sure if they know that I blog). I have been such an a*s leader for 1 year. I have caused so much trouble and sorry for the days when I overslept and came late for the meeting. Thank you for everything =) Congratulation for the graduation and Wish you all the best for the job. Cya when I cya =)

Waiting for Bus

I am sitting in da library waiting for the bus. And I absolutely hav no mood to do da project. So, here I am writing the blog.

I have few things that bother me lately. In Mr.Li class, we talked about ethics. I like this subject so much since Mr.Li always give us a life lesson. And today I wanna talk about one virtue. Forgiveness. Mr.Li said that when someone doesnt forgive other people for their mistake, that someone will only hurt him/herself and not helping the person that he/she hate at all.

I have my own opinion for that. Yes I agree that when we are angry with someone, we are hurting ourselves and that feeling actually become something that keep holding us back. I completely understand that it hurts. However, if he is saying that we are doing no good for that person, Im kinda not agree with that. For me, it depends on the situation.

Truly speaking, I am kind of person that will angry at someone easily and regret that straight away. I am currently not talking to total of 3 people. First one is my ex-best-buddy. His name is Felix. He used to be my best friend ever. But I am not talking to him now. It is a long story. I will post it sometimes. I did try to say sorry and all but he ignored me, so I decided to hate him as well. The second one is also my best-buddy (still consider him as my best friend). His name is Vin-Vin.

See the problem herE? The person that I am not talking to are actually my best friends. What am I supposed to do?

The third person. Let's call this person BL. I am not talking to BL not because I hate her or anything. I am just waiting for her to finally SEE the BIG problem in front of her. I am not talking to her because I want to give her space for herself to think... Sigh. I think I am bad at explaining. Shud just post this some other day...

dats why people call it FALLING in Love

I think from all the person that I know... Im the only one who can fall in love as easy as I turn my head...

I fell in love when a guy is nice to me (although he is nice to evryone)
I fell in love when a guy do something sweet to me (although it meant nothing to him)
I fell in love when a guy make me laugh off my tears (although he just dun wanna see people cry)
I fell in love when a guy is smart (although that's the way he is)
I fell in love when I feel like it...

Alright? See? I fell in love as easy as that. Anyone can suggest anything that I can do to stop this kind of behaviour?

And after IoLa told me that she always fell in love with a guy that she knew she couldnt get... It came to my mind that I always fell in love in a guy that I already know that he doesnt like me. See the pattern herE? =.=

A Talk With Mr. Patrick

All this time, I keep thinking that Mr. Patrick is a nice person, not a nice lecturer. But now I think I should add one more. He is a nice friend. Why? I had a talk with him this morning and truly speaking, before the session start I was kinda nervous. I thought he would say something bad like "I dont think you can pass this project unless you try harder" or maybe even more extreme "I think you will have to repeat the subject again next semester". However, he didnt.

Instead, he told me something (I couldnt believe I say this) inspiring. He taught me how to be a good leader. He said I should give an example and try to build a good harmony with my team member. Well, yea... I will try to do that. As the matter of fact, all this time I dont dare to admit that all those problems are my fault. Now, I could see the problem from different point of view. It seems to be me the one who messed up everything...It is me who failed to be a leader. And, I admit that.

For now, I have a very good view of everything and I dont feel like saying anything since I dont want to change my view again. I am very easy to be convinced. So I dont want to hear any suggestion first... Maybe I will, later.

Alright, it is time for me to fix the mess that I created. Wish me luck everybody =)

Loads to say

There are loads of things to say. Load of things had happened. Wanted to update the blog but seems like the time wont allow me to do so.

Loads of happy things yet loads of sad things. I was expecting those blue sky to destress me. Seems like the sky is busy too so it got depress as well since it never show its blue color...

Hope to see that blue color soon. And I hope I can update everything soon. And... Hope everyone has a good day~

Back to Kuching (again)

Now, Im sitting in front of the pc in the library. Then I think now Im back to Kuching already. I have a resit test in half an hour. Wish me luck, k? Seems like my stomach will explode or something. I just dun feel right. Is it because Im nervous? Anyway... I need to go to the toilet. Cya all =p

Chinese New Year

Happy Chinese New Year for everyone who is celebrating =)

Im now in Indonesia for this Chinese new year celebration. My sister is here. My brother and his wife is coming. Now seems like everyone's gonna be here. Im so happy..... and worry at the same time. Well, since I got 1 resit and my revision is not a good news. I have 6 more chapters to go. I should put more effort on this. I don't wanna fail that stupid subject...No way. If I have to see Raymond's face again, Im going to commit suicide.

Me and my sister bought loads of fireworks. I think this time, the celebration is gonna be fun. My family is complete. All of them are here (extra my sister in law and my sister's friend). And we have (more than enough) fireworks. So, I think it's gonna be fun =)

Anyway, let's talk about childhood. I had a talk with my mom and she told me about my childhood. Im going to start with my birth day, the day I was born into the world. My mom told me that my dad was nervous and worry and he slept in the car. Once he heard the baby crying, he went in straight away. After I've been cleaned up, he hold me and was very happy.

My mom said that I am a very lucky girl. I can help to think that I cannot give anything in return. Loads of things had happened in the family, and I have no idea about that. Actually, most of them are bad things. Things happened for a reason. But still cannot help to think something bad. Can I give them something in return? Let's see.

Spring Fashion Show 2008

Yea, I went to a fashion show. I couldn’t believe that I actually went there. I went there with Diana since she always say that she has nothing to do and bored. So I asked her to join me to the fashion show. We went to Gamelan before we headed to civic center for the show.

Most of the dance club BOD was there such as: Daniel, Ah Zoo, Amy and (of coz) Wilson. Wilson was one of the models. Since organizer of the fashion show is Swinburne student, then it is no question that most of the audience and (again, of coz) model were either Swinburne students or staffs. I met loads of shocking couple. I didn’t know that they were together. I didn’t even know that they already ended their previous relationship. Oh no… I think I should put more attention to everything that is going on around me. So, yea, since most of the models are Swinburne students, I know some of them: April, Ayu, Eing, Fabiola, Wilson, Ring, Adrian, Oscar, Jordan and Tiffany’s ex (are they still on? Please update me. Im kinda left behind here).

Soon as I got da picture from PK, I will post it here. I like this one model… I don’t know whether he is Swinburners (Swinburne student) or not.

I have to admit that April is really professional. Most of the people walked with confusion. She walked with confidence, which is really great. I have to say that Ayu is really great as well. This girl knows how to pose. I like that. I know I’m no model; I just can see and give comment, so please excuse me for saying something wrong.

From the audience, I met quite loads of my ‘lost’ friends: PK, Eddy, Leonard and (shockingly) Edison. Finally I get to see this crazy guy again. He is seriously crazy. I like his craziness. He said he wanted to make love to Wilson because he was so hot. Haha. That was funny looking them really posing on the stage.

Talking about the audience, I saw Kenny Sia, the famous Malaysian blogger. I wanted to greet him so bad. However, since my friend did not seem encouraging at all, then I held it. This is the second time I met him. The first time was at KFC. I was really sure that it was him but my friends said he was not… until they could clearly see that he was Kenny. Again… I wanted to greet him but my friend did not seem encouraging. So there I was (again) did not greet him. I think I should greet him the next time I meet him. By that time, I will not care about my friend anymore. I want to talk to him. He is so funny.

I enjoyed the night, but the same thing did not happen to Diana. I don’t think she liked it. Maybe because I was busy talking with other people? I feel really sorry for her. Worst thing was: she sent me home. Don’t I just sound so troublesome?

At the end of the party, I wanted to talk to Wilson but he was busy with his other model friends taking pictures. So I left.

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Talking about something else, Ratna and her cousin are here. They need to go to the doctor. They are leaving on Saturday. I don’t think I can blend with her cousin. She is so… I don’t know. One thing that I know, I will never blend with her. She is wayyyyy to complicated for me.

Anyway, I went to shop with Ratna and I bought a cute sandals. The color is Pink. I fell in love on the first sight for the sandals. I will put every picture here later. K? Hehe...

Take The Lead!

Yea...wake up please... I just got a hit on the head so bad... I admit that I've been such a stupid leader of the team. I dun deserve to be a leader in the team. I dun even know why the supervisor chose me at the first place. I think he wanna give me a chance to be something. From nothing to something.

I am now (while typing this) doing the Gantt Chart for the project. Gantt Chart is a file where you put all your schedule of your project. You can track the progress and everything. Then NOW, I just realized that we only have purely 20 days to do the coding for the system. Oh my~ Im going crazy, really. Then we have to do the testing for the program. Seriously, are we ever going to finish this project? Or, to be exact, can it be done under my lead? Can I take the lead?

I am pretty sure that I can do it. I will prove to my team member that I actually can do something. This time my angel side is winning. The evil side of mine cannot say anything.

Now...If you would please...I will continue my chart =D

Home Alone

Now I wont say that Im alone in Kuching. Since Im only alone at home, but once I get out, there are loads of people. Hehe. So that's why I called it as "Home Alone" not "Alone in Kuching". Hehe

In fact, it is not as scary as I thought it would be. Maybe because that is my house so I feel like home and nothing matter. I just chill. Talking about alone... Im not alone per se. I just reached home when [N] called. He went to Gamelan a minute after I went back. So he gave me a call. I am happy because at least someone call me purely just to ask how things going without any other purpose. He has been sweet. So as my other girl friends. They have been sweet as well.

No matter how sweet [N] was, he seemed cannot get someone out of his head yet, especially when he just broke up with his girlfriend. Well, maybe he will never forgets this girl. So, we were just talking as usual and I was saying that I usually eat alone when he started to talk about "her". He said that he pity that girl for staying alone and has nothing to do. Let me make this clear...I did ask her out... We went for lunch... We went for shopping. What else does [N] expect from me? Follow her 24-7?

Anyway, that was my evil side talking. My angel side say: maybe [N] talks about her a lot because he doesnt know what to say, so he choose to talk about someone that I know. Then, recall my new years resolution, I prefer to listen to my angel side.

Let's talk about something else. I am busy watching movie lately. Well, series movie of course. The girl in the movie is so arrogant. And, I think I have to agree that sometimes movie can give a bad influence. I started to act like her...Oh no~ I scolded a taxi driver on da other day. I never meant to do that. It flow, just like that. Ew...Im sorry taxi driver...Never meant to... I think I should put another extra point on my new years resolutions: be more patient =p

Random News

Oh no… Haha. Im in Kuching now. And yea… Im alone. I cannot believe that I really am alone. There is nothing about our project. There is going to be a lab session with the other tomorrow. Let me see if I there is actually something that we really can do. Anyway, Miss Yee was here for a week. She is my bestie since I was in high school. And we still get along well. That’s what makes me love her so much. I think we still can be so close because basically we are the same type. Same stupidity, same craziness, same thoughts and also same love for fashion. So, there is no problem.

We were shopping like crazy. Miss Yee bought loads of thing. Since our love fashion is so big, we decided to dress up. And, no question, we made loads of head turned. Hehe. Kinda funny there but we were having fun counting the turning head. We made a day plan. Guess what? It’s completely useless. We didn’t follow any of the plan. Haha. Oh my~ Loads of funny thing had happened.

I wanted to say thank you to Miss Yee for being such a lovely friend. Im so happy having a friend like you. Hope we can get along well until the end of time =)

Talking about fashion, I always wanted to become a fashion stylist; not a fashion designer. I like to dress someone since I cannot always dress myself up because I have imperfection; but I have a good asset too =p. I like to dress Miss L. She has a very great body. Miss Yee also has a nice body. I like her body more since she is not too fat neither too thin. She’s curvy, and I like it.

Being a fashion stylist will be very great. I dun dress myself, so you will not ever think to ask me to dress you up. Sometimes, when I am in the mood, I will dress to impress. I have loads of style that I like but I cannot copy them because of my “flaws”. After I gave it a second thought, I mix and match some of my cloth and I am thinking of taking few pictures of myself wearing them. I know a few good angles to take pictures (thanks to [N] photography). And I will ask my brother to take the pictures later during the Chinese New Year. Actually I wanted to ask [N] photography to take my picture but [N] will puke and then sick and then his camera will be broken. No… I didn’t exaggerate. The owner of [N] photography is choosy.

So, from now on, I will dress my friend and take a picture of her/him and then post it here and your comment will be very helpful =p

Happy New Year 2008

Happy New Year 2008 everyone!!

How was your new years eve? Great? I hope it was. Anyway, my new year’s eve, as usual, I just stay at home with my parents. But this time it was a lil’ bit different. I went to watch movie with my dad while my mom had a dinner wif her friends. After dat, 3 of us went home and supposed to eat our roasted chicken for celebration, but since my parents are tired, so they sleep early. Actually I wish they could stand until 12 midnight and at least give me a chance to spend the changes of the year with them. Im ok tho. At least they could stand until 11.30. Gud enough =p

My new year resolution are:
I have to study hard if I really wanna see Paris.
I have to live a healthy life.
I will try my best to make my parents happy.
I will work harder on my dance.
I will be more serious.
I will think more positively =)
I will live life to the full.
I think that should summarize what I want to do.
What is yours? =)

So, I was chatting with my high school friend. He was drunk. Here’s the conversation (the one on the bracket is the translated version), it might sounds weird as you should understand Indonesian:
Him: Lo lagi dimana Har? (Where are you now?)
Me : di rumah adja (at home)
Me : tingkat ke-sober-an le brapa ne? (what is your soberness level now?)
Him: rumah gwa tingkat 21 (my house is level 21)
=_= oh no~
What the hell? Haha.

Seems like everyone were having party, well, hope you enjoyed the night. And in this new year, I wish you all da best in family, study, work and life =)

Note: Im goin back Kuching tomorrow. Dun feel like goin back there at all. It’s not dat I dun like Kuching or wat but I still wanna be here wif my family… I dunno how to explain, yea… But I wanna be here. Anyway, I also wanna go back there as Yee come wif me.. Oh my god… Hope I can survive there =p

End Of The Year 2007

Hiya all. This post right here is the last post of the year. Actually I wanna save this post for the right time. Since I hope that “right time”, which is going to be my worst day ever, will never come, I will write it now.

I was watching supernatural, the TV series. Im sure most of the people would have watched at least 1 episode of the series, or perhaps have heard about it. For those who have no idea, da movie is about brothers who try to defeat the demon. And I was watching one last week. It was about this demon that can make your wish come true. It is like the Aladdin story. However, this one is the bad one.

Lets talk about what he can do. Basically he can make everything come true. Wish you had a better life? Wish you had a smokin’ hot sport car? Wish you had a house wif 50 rooms and 30 bathrooms? Wish you had a better job? He can make it come true. He can spin back time. He can make what seems not possible, possible. Everything will look exactly like a fairytale.

But…But…Wait a second. That is just in your imagination while your body is actually hanging somewhere while he suck your soul and slowly you will die.

Now, it came to me. What if I met him one day when my life is all disaster? What if he offers me a wish? While I know that he is going to make me happy again. All happy, no problem, no stress, all happy. What will I do? I know that all those happiness is not real. I know that all those fairytale is really a fairytale which I can only imagined it. What will I do? What will I do?

Actually I dunno what will I do. Depends on how depress I am. Bigger possibility that I will take it and let him takes my body. I dun care. As long as I can meet everyone that I love inside the imaginary world, I dun care. Sounds pathetic, I know.

Along with this, I would like to say. In the real world, this demon does exist. In the form of drugs and all. Im not advertising anything but I believe that thing can make us lose control and feeling relax and high and all those shit. Im not going for that one. I will never do drugs. Lets not.

In the end of the year 2007 I would like to wish all da best for everyone in the next year.
Lets hope 2008 will be a better year for everyone.
Lets hope all the trouble will be solved.
Lets hope we will never need any help from the demon.

Happy New Year 2008 =)

Study Abroad...

Study abroad might sound either scary or interesting. For me, studying abroad will be both scare me and interest me in its unique way. It is scary as I am not home. Not my hometown and Im totally a stranger there. But yet, it is interesting as Im in a whole new place where next will be my second home.

You can say Im old fashion or anything, but study abroad is sounds totally cool for me. Yea yea…

I was try to run away a night before I went to Kuching to study. However, I couldn’t. That is for sure. How can I run away while I cannot even go out in a legal way? Then I could calm myself down and cry for a while then went to sleep. Finally I have spent 2.5 years in dat unknown place. What was unknown are now familiar. What was new is now usual. I can get myself used to it. The environment. The university. The people, etc.

It looked so miserable at the first time. My parents were there for the first week to help me moved in and all. After that, I was on my own. Miss R was my room mate. Since her parents were around, she went to stay with her parent while I stayed at the hostel all by myself. I went out for meal myself. That is completely pathetic. Then I started to hang out wif Hudy, Dian and Lestari. Not long, Miss R came with us. So, maybe studying abroad not dat bad after all.

Wel, actually studying in Kuching make me feels like goin nowhere. Kuching is small town. There are loads of Indonesians. And the citizen speaks weird English which is not what I expected. My impression of studying abroad will be like talking in proper English everyday, meeting people where they are not the people from da same hometown as mine (maybe some people will be alright, but I hope I could get along wif da people from outside Indonesia as well).

I was reading a book. It was actually based on a blog of a very funny writer from Indonesia. His name is Raditya Dika. People call him DICKa. Hehe. Anyway, he was talking about his daily life in Adelaide. Then I found it interesting. He met people. He make friends wif people from various places. That is fun! I think he has a black fren as well. I mean da black people. I would LOVE to be fren wif them. They are fun. They can dance nicely. Hip Hop. And most of the time, they are funny. So, actually meeting black people is one of my dreams as well, like… black people from America or something. Hey yo my man! Haha =p

DICKa was not gud in English at the first place but still he can communicate wif his friend. Im wondering… As my English is not bad (am I right?), how come I cannot be like him? Im jealous.

My favorite spot in Kuching will be Coffee Bean. The place make me feels as if Im not in Kuching. As if Im somewhere else. As if Im in America or maybe Australia. It is hard for me to explain. Maybe you should go and see it urself.

I was not type of girl who always goes out. I was a girl who always at home before 7pm unless there is any tuition or there was a birthday party. I never went to watch midnight show at the cinema. I was a girl who always sleeps at 9pm sharp unless I was studying or it was holiday or I couldn’t sleep. I was a girl who never fell in love until Junior High. I was always-at-home type of girl.

Now, I always go out at 7pm coz that is the dinner time. I will not sleep before 11pm. I always go out to watch midnight show at the cinema. I always go out for supper. I do drink. I’ve been to the pub twice. No worries. I was not drunk (and Im still hating Mr NR for saying dat I was drunk while I was sleepy instead). I dunno which version of ME that I like. Although I might sound naughty and wild now, but Im not. I dun do drugs. I will always say NO to smoke since I HATE it so much. I will not have sex since that is not my culture (unless somebody rapes me… but I dun think it will happen and lets hope it will not happen).

It is fun to have your own crib which u can put anything as u like as it is yours. But sometimes it is scary to live alone unless; you stay in the middle of the town. You can spend the time with you friends there. You can do almost anything there. It will be so much fun. Im talking about a small cute flat, not a big 3-rooms-and-luxury flat. When I work later on, I will have my own flat. If there is anyone has watch HONEY movie before, I would LOVE to have a flat like hers. If anyone know any flat like that in Singapore, please let me know. I will appreciate it so much =)

Holiday Sickness

Hola! Hola! Holiday, holiday. Im going back to Kuching on the 2nd January. I dun feel like goin back at all. But I also wanna go back there. So not consistent, yea? This time Miss Yee is coming wif me. So Im kinda excited about this.

Maybe me and Yee will go to the pub or something. Im not a clubbing type of girl but I can dance in da club. So I like to go to the club. But I only went to the club twice while Im in Kuching. I had a bad experience wif da club last time. Da first time I went to da club, it was Dayang’s bday. And everyone was drunk. I did not.

Yea, time for trivia. Im a gud girl. I dun smoke. I dun do drugs. But I drink (not drunk tho). I love to drink (as in alcoholic drinks). I like cocktails. I love them. But I dun drunk. That is important. I still hating Mr. N for saying me of being drunk while I was not. I was sleepy but I was totally sober. I still hate him for saying that.

So, maybe me and Yee will go to da pub and dance and of coz drink a lil’ bit. And most likely, we will go shopping. Haha. I love to shop. Girls love to shop.

Well, u know wat, I wasn’t about to say this. What I actually wanted to say is my holiday here. What am I doing during the holiday? Three words: sleep, eat and astro (watching movie). I look exactly like a piggy now. I do hang out sometimes. I went to the movies wif my dad. My dad rarely go to the movies, but since Im around, he go to the movie all the time. Hehe. We went to watch I am Legend, War Lords and National Treasure: The Book of Secrets.

I love astro since I can watch my favorite CSI series here and also up to date again wif MTV. I was watching CSI. The case was about a guy who still ‘haunted’ his ex-girlfren. No, he is not dead. He is alive and he is obsessed wif da girl. Dat is insane. Imagine a guy like dat loving u. How can u escape? But I like a line: “when a girl say fuck off, fuck off”. Well, not exactly like dat. I forgot da line =p

What else do I do? Sometimes I cook something stupid, or else I will do da dirty dishes. And, of course, reading my comic again (as well as tidy them up).

What do I do lately? Im suffering from a very bad stomachache. I, finally, having my period; which only happen once every half year. Something is wrong wif da hormone or something. Im not really sure wat da problem is. So, I got my period and it’s freakin hurt but I dun wanna take any medicine. I dun wanna disturb this rare moment wif any medicine and ruin everything. So I think I have to bear wif it.

Well, I dunno wat else I suppose to say. I will jus go back to da movie Im waching while typing this.

NB: Im so sorry for not having any pictures in the last few post since I dun hav time to upload any. I know it might be boring to read a blog FULL of WORDS… That is why I try to put some colors but I think it still not working tho…

The Future

I was texting Miss E few hours back. I was telling her that Im goin back to Kuching very soon. At first nothing came to my mind yet. But soon, I thought about something else. I was thinking the fact that next semester will be the last semester for Miss R. And soon, she will be heading to Singapore to look for a job and all those shit.

What bothers me here is the fact that she’s goin to leave soon. So, yeah, we have decided to go to Singapore together (we talked about that on our 1st semester), but now she’s leaving first. Actually I wanted to say that I convinced her to go to Singapore, as it is always been my plan to go there from the beginning, even before I started to go to college, or more like Im the one who first decided to go to Singapore; but after I gave it a second thought, she might have chosen Singapore as well, maybe it’s just that I didn’t know or something. So I exactly cannot claim it as my statement as I am not. Well, did you get what I mean here? I couldn’t blame her at all as I never work hard to finish my college on time.

Anyway, this brings up another thought about the real world (that is the term that used by Miss E – ‘real world’). Will I EVER get a job? A real job? A job from my field. Now, if I do, can I do the job, really? Oh no. This seems to be more complicated than what I thought before. I will be so fucked up if I know nothing about, so-called “my field”.

I was panic. I was panic. PANIC. Again, panic. Suddenly my face was all pale and my mom thought Im sick (well, actually I am but Im not pale). Seriously, this can’t be worse.

Now, after I finally can calm myself down, I can think again. So, my plan now is to revise everything I have learnt before and focus on my project. This project will help me a lot. Im sure if I do it correctly and truly with all my seriousness and all, I can do my job later.

I can assure that this gonna be a loooong post, so for all readers, if you think it might be boring (which I think it will), you can stop reading now. One advice from me: if you DO want your wish to come true, work seriously on that. I know you might have heard that thousand times but that is really true. Believe me.

Welcome back (for reader who continue reading =p). When I was in high school, I and my friends had a group band. The name of the band was Crazy Limit. We were so fly. We won the first price for band competition. Haha. That was cool. Anyway, we were talking about this café. That was just an imagination but actually I hope we could really do that someday in the future. Our idea was to have a café. It will be a café where people could sit back and relax while we (as the owner) will sing for them. Sounds great yea? We will have a theme for every night. Sounds really cool for me. Let’s see where the wind brings me, yea?

Going to the future we must have a good preparation. That is exactly what my father taught me. He always reminds me to study well and get a well-paid job. He doesn’t want me to end up like him, working outdoor and has to work his ass off everyday. That always makes me cry. My father is an electric installer so he has to look for the building and then measure the heights and shit. He has to draw out the plan of where the cable should go and stuff. He actually draws that by hand since he’s not really good to draw it by computer. When I was around, I could help him to draw little simple stuff. However, ever since Im no longer around and went to Kuching, he has to use the old style, draw it by hand. That also makes me cry all the time. I also cry for not able to teach him how to use the software.

Seems like I cried a lot yea? I admit it. I cry a lot. And I will always cry. Now talking about my mom, she will always be the greatest mother I’ve ever seen. She cooks, she drives, she bakes cake, she sews, and she can do almost everything. Whenever I am in trouble she is always able to help me. I remember this stupid handcraft that I have to do when I was in the primary school. I had to make a durian. I repeat durian. Durian made from paper and newspaper and all. I was in trouble since I am not good in that. Please just dun ask me to build a beautiful little box for your jewelry. I will fuck it up. No, Im not kidding. Im very serious. So there was my mother helped me to make that stupid durian. And guess what? My durian looked like a real durian. See? I always fail doing everything that I wanted to do. Why is that? Maybe I didn’t try hard enough.

For the future, I want to keep my dancing class going. I perhaps join any dance academy or something. And when I am good enough, I will teach to get more income. I will also keep this fashion stylist thing going. I can work at any big fashion shop where people actually need fashion stylist.

So, for the short term goal, I will revise everything I have learnt and lost some weight. What’s with the weight? I will talk about this in the next post about dancing ok? Maybe not exactly next but next as in next. Got me?

So basically that is all that I wanted to say. Haha. What so funny is a simple text message can bring up this loooong thought. Anyway, again I wanna remind all the readers, one advice from me: If you DO WANT your WISH to COME TRUE, work hard on that. Don’t regret it at the end like me. OK? =)

Poverty

Poverty… Im not talking about this because of the previous post ok… Actually, the idea to write about this is because Im in Indonesia, where poverty can be really seen.

Around 6pm Monday, December 10, 2007. I went out with my mother to fetch my father at his work place, the hospital (no… He’s not a doctor. My sister is. My father is an electric installer). The reason I followed my mother was because I dun wanna stay alone at home while the light was out. So I decided to go wif her. When I passed the guard booth, I saw this Mr.Guard sitting alone in the darkness doing his job. Sitting all alone there and nobody will notice him.

I think he has been working here for like… forever. I just realized this. He has been working here since I moved here. It is like 10 years ago and he is still there. I pity him, honestly. He is so fat and can hardly move. I dunno if it happened to be some bad guys trying to enter the housing site, how can he do his job (as in run or catch them)? I have no idea. But still, he is there.

Then my mind flies… I am wondering how he can make money from this job. How can he buy something nice for his children? Does he ever think of going somewhere for holiday? Does he ever think of buying a car? Does he ever cry…………That makes me feel like a jerk or something by spending money for high heels and stuff while he... Oh my~ I am so sad…

Can we really do something to completely make poverty history? Can we, really? I dunno. Let’s start doing something and not only sitting and hope it happen one day.

Huhu… Im so sad…